wow
look at this. every one of those dots and smudges are galaxies. the hubble deep field covers a speck of the sky only about the width of a dime 75 feet away. so many galaxies can be found in such a tiny space, imagine how many of them there really are.
the milky way, the galaxy we belong to and where all the stars we see are from, is only one of billions of others. our solar system is really an insignificant dot in our galaxy. similarly, our galaxy is just another dot in the universe. then, it is really really really stupid to say that earth is the only place that has life.
and according to the big bang theory, everything in this universe came from a point smaller than anything we can ever know of, but contains everything that the universe is made of. this point is known as singularity. before there was time and space, there was this little point. the point has no past, no present and no future. there is no darkness and no light. it was just hanging in a viod. then, BANG! the little point decided to explode. from there, the point expanded and created space and time.
there are then three theories of what happens after this.
the big crunch
if the gravitational attraction of all the matter in the observable horizon is high enough, then it could stop the expansion of the universe, and then reverse it. the universe would then contract. eventually, all matter and energy would be compressed back into a singularity. there are theories about what happens after this, but these remain uncertain as the physics of singularities remains in question.
the big freeze
if the gravitational attraction of all matter is low enough, then the expansion will never stop. as the matter disperses into ever greater and greater volumes, new star formation would drop off. the average temperature of the universe would asymptotically approach absolute zero, and the universe would become very still and quiet. eventually all protons would decay, and the universe would consist of dispersed subatomic particles. the big freeze is also known as the heat death of the universe.
balance
if the gravitational attraction of all the matter in the observable horizon is just right, then the expansion of the universe will approach zero. the temperature of the universe would approach a stable value slightly above absolute zero. the end result (with protons decaying) would be similar to the big freeze.
that's what worries me.
of course, i know that it won't happen any time soon, or even in the greatest forseeable future. but then, it is depressing to think about how everything that my existence is about would be gone. let's imagine there is a heaven. then in heaven, i look upon as the vastness of the universe is sucked into nothingness. even if there's no heaven, the thought is still disturbing.
but life earth would probably be destroyed way before that. lets say humans somehow manage to survive through all these crap that they are creating for themselves. let's say they manage to survive for another 5 million years.
by then, the sun will enter its red giant phase, expanding as the hydrogen fuel in the core is consumed. while it is likely that this expansion will reach the current position of earth's orbit, recent research suggests that mass loss from the sun earlier in its red giant phase will cause the earth's orbit to move further out, preventing it from being swallowed. following the red giant phase, the sun will become a white dwarf, slowly cooling for a further 5 billion years or so.
so let's imagine there's a heaven again. in heaven, we all watch as our descendants are being burnt alive as the sun slowly gets hotter and hotter. IF somehow they manage to survive this, they would have to live in eternal cold and darkness. and IF they still survive this, they would then be brought to inexistance. everything would cease to exist. this isin't fun, since the atoms that currently make up my body would also cease to exist.
from the depths of my extremely fertile imagination, we shall imagine that our descendants somehow still manage to survive till the final seconds before everything goes back to singularity. then they would be thinking "what the fuck?! in 5 seconds everything would be gone." then "AHHHH!" squish, die. or more like cease to exist.
then people would say "oh, nothing to be afraid of, since everyone has to go through the same thing." like what they say for things like exams and death. but if everyone has to have their arms chopped off at some point of their lives, does that mean that it's nothing to be afraid of? NO. and i fear death, or more like the uncertainty of what happens after death.
if there's no heaven, death is bad. everything that i've gone through in my life would be gone for ever and ever. if that's the case, why live in the first place? the 70-odd years i've experienced is totally insignificant compared to the billions and trillions of years in the life of the universe. i'm totally useless and my existance is pointless.
if there's a heaven, death is still bad. because then, i would be sitting in heaven for eternity. i'm already so damn bored now, imagine what it would be like to be bored for eternity. my existance would also be useless and pointless, since i really cannot think of any use for staying up there for ever. even when all space and time do not exist, i would still be rotting in heaven. not fun at all. and also, according to christianity, heaven is pure, humans are not. therefore, it is in my belif that i will not be allowed to remember anything and everything that happened to me during my time on earth, since my thoughts are unpure. so then, the question again is, what's the point of my existance here? why can't god just put me in heaven to live out eternity?
since the time i realised that i will die some day, i have been extremely worried about this. obviously, i knew that i would die one day from the furthest memory i can remember, i simply believed that i would go to heaven. what happens after that, i didn't think about. then one sunday afternoon about 3-4 years ago, the thought suddenly came to me while i was staring at the seconds ticking by on a clock. the thought was too much for me to handle and i cried. the thought still troubles me deeply now, and i still have not made up my decision on whether it would be better if there was a heaven or not.
however, i think if i had a choice, i would rather burn in hell with my memories intact then go to heaven and be bored in eternal happiness without any memories. that's what i currently think anyway.
wow! super long post. today was a bad day. i was supposed to assemble for my o'level science practical at 9:15 am and i woke up at 9, and my house is at least 25 minutes from school by bus.
the milky way, the galaxy we belong to and where all the stars we see are from, is only one of billions of others. our solar system is really an insignificant dot in our galaxy. similarly, our galaxy is just another dot in the universe. then, it is really really really stupid to say that earth is the only place that has life.
and according to the big bang theory, everything in this universe came from a point smaller than anything we can ever know of, but contains everything that the universe is made of. this point is known as singularity. before there was time and space, there was this little point. the point has no past, no present and no future. there is no darkness and no light. it was just hanging in a viod. then, BANG! the little point decided to explode. from there, the point expanded and created space and time.
there are then three theories of what happens after this.
the big crunch
if the gravitational attraction of all the matter in the observable horizon is high enough, then it could stop the expansion of the universe, and then reverse it. the universe would then contract. eventually, all matter and energy would be compressed back into a singularity. there are theories about what happens after this, but these remain uncertain as the physics of singularities remains in question.
the big freeze
if the gravitational attraction of all matter is low enough, then the expansion will never stop. as the matter disperses into ever greater and greater volumes, new star formation would drop off. the average temperature of the universe would asymptotically approach absolute zero, and the universe would become very still and quiet. eventually all protons would decay, and the universe would consist of dispersed subatomic particles. the big freeze is also known as the heat death of the universe.
balance
if the gravitational attraction of all the matter in the observable horizon is just right, then the expansion of the universe will approach zero. the temperature of the universe would approach a stable value slightly above absolute zero. the end result (with protons decaying) would be similar to the big freeze.
that's what worries me.
of course, i know that it won't happen any time soon, or even in the greatest forseeable future. but then, it is depressing to think about how everything that my existence is about would be gone. let's imagine there is a heaven. then in heaven, i look upon as the vastness of the universe is sucked into nothingness. even if there's no heaven, the thought is still disturbing.
but life earth would probably be destroyed way before that. lets say humans somehow manage to survive through all these crap that they are creating for themselves. let's say they manage to survive for another 5 million years.
by then, the sun will enter its red giant phase, expanding as the hydrogen fuel in the core is consumed. while it is likely that this expansion will reach the current position of earth's orbit, recent research suggests that mass loss from the sun earlier in its red giant phase will cause the earth's orbit to move further out, preventing it from being swallowed. following the red giant phase, the sun will become a white dwarf, slowly cooling for a further 5 billion years or so.
so let's imagine there's a heaven again. in heaven, we all watch as our descendants are being burnt alive as the sun slowly gets hotter and hotter. IF somehow they manage to survive this, they would have to live in eternal cold and darkness. and IF they still survive this, they would then be brought to inexistance. everything would cease to exist. this isin't fun, since the atoms that currently make up my body would also cease to exist.
from the depths of my extremely fertile imagination, we shall imagine that our descendants somehow still manage to survive till the final seconds before everything goes back to singularity. then they would be thinking "what the fuck?! in 5 seconds everything would be gone." then "AHHHH!" squish, die. or more like cease to exist.
then people would say "oh, nothing to be afraid of, since everyone has to go through the same thing." like what they say for things like exams and death. but if everyone has to have their arms chopped off at some point of their lives, does that mean that it's nothing to be afraid of? NO. and i fear death, or more like the uncertainty of what happens after death.
if there's no heaven, death is bad. everything that i've gone through in my life would be gone for ever and ever. if that's the case, why live in the first place? the 70-odd years i've experienced is totally insignificant compared to the billions and trillions of years in the life of the universe. i'm totally useless and my existance is pointless.
if there's a heaven, death is still bad. because then, i would be sitting in heaven for eternity. i'm already so damn bored now, imagine what it would be like to be bored for eternity. my existance would also be useless and pointless, since i really cannot think of any use for staying up there for ever. even when all space and time do not exist, i would still be rotting in heaven. not fun at all. and also, according to christianity, heaven is pure, humans are not. therefore, it is in my belif that i will not be allowed to remember anything and everything that happened to me during my time on earth, since my thoughts are unpure. so then, the question again is, what's the point of my existance here? why can't god just put me in heaven to live out eternity?
since the time i realised that i will die some day, i have been extremely worried about this. obviously, i knew that i would die one day from the furthest memory i can remember, i simply believed that i would go to heaven. what happens after that, i didn't think about. then one sunday afternoon about 3-4 years ago, the thought suddenly came to me while i was staring at the seconds ticking by on a clock. the thought was too much for me to handle and i cried. the thought still troubles me deeply now, and i still have not made up my decision on whether it would be better if there was a heaven or not.
however, i think if i had a choice, i would rather burn in hell with my memories intact then go to heaven and be bored in eternal happiness without any memories. that's what i currently think anyway.
wow! super long post. today was a bad day. i was supposed to assemble for my o'level science practical at 9:15 am and i woke up at 9, and my house is at least 25 minutes from school by bus.
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