no_title_is_cool?

Thursday, June 09, 2005

i (really) love africans

Dear ryan,

Many thanks for your interest ao assist me.First i want to assure you that there is no risk involved in the transfers of the funds overseas as all you have to do for me is to stand as the foreign beneficiary of the consignment at the security to claim it in your name through the help of a lawyer that will assist us.

Meanwhile i do not know your friend here in Abidjan and i will like to let you know from now that i do not want anybody to know something involving the transfers of the funds including your friend here in my country.

I think i will not have any problem with you in being together and having t feel me but you should handle me with much respect and care when the time comes after a successful transfer of the funds.

Could you let me know when i should have time to have a chat with on the internet so we can discuss further things regarding the transfers.
I wait to hear from you as soon as possible.

Your's faithfully,
Debora

she knows my name because it's in my yahoo account.

my reply:

Deborah my beloved,
I am happy to hear from you. However you still have not addressed the problems from the first email i sent you, which i believe are crucial in the success of our relationship.

I have had terrible nightmares for the past few nights. I dreamt that your father's business associates killed me and fed my body to dogs by luring me with a promise of US$1,200,000 (One Million Two Hundred Thousand United States Dollars) [the amount she wants to give me], after I helped you in your business transaction. As a result, I have been unable to sleep, and live in fear that they would discover our current conversations, and proceed to hunt me down and kill me.

Also, I believe it would be pointless for you to come over here because your aims are to get a residential permit, and to study here. But as I have told you, our local Government does not grant residentship to people from Abidjan.

Besides that, I have also recently spoken to the heads of all the local Universities, and they all told me that they do not accept students from Abidjan because they think you people are stupid. Although Iobviously disagree, I believe that there is no way for you to be able to enrol in a University here.

You mentioned in your first email that it was my long lost friend who gave you my name, so why would you not know him? I have an urgent need to find him due to personal reasons, so I sincerely hope that you would not withhold any useful information from me.

Also, you said that you do not want anyone to know about our business, including my good friend. However, since it was he who told you my name, surely he would have known the intended purpose of it, and therefore be aware of our business? You also give me the impression that the business we are doing is illegal since you are so secretive about the affair.

I believe I would be unable to control myself around you, and thus unable to treat you with much respect you deserve, due to my current position.

I believe we should continue our business through this method instead of through chats. I lost almost all my fingers in an unfortunate accident involving my mother, a hammer and my fingers when i was young. I am only with with my right little finger, and typing this message alone took me more than 5 hours. Thus I believe that chatting would not be effective due to my slow typing speed.

Please help clear my doubts. Once again, I would be happy to do business with you and money is never a problem. One more thing, I prefer to be called Davis because Ryan is the name my mother gave me, and my relationship with her has been very extreme after the unfortunate hammer incident when I was young.

Love,
Davis


go listen to
pretty girl (the way) - sugarcult

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