be gone
last night i had a dream. it was at night and i had killed someone so i decided to kill myself in the morning because i'll be sentenced to death anyway. i was supposed to eat a pill and die painlessly.
the rest of the night was spent trying to deal with that One Remaining Issue in my life and also meeting various people along the way, like my mother and some other people i can't recall now. it was quite an interesting dream, thinking that oh shit i won't be exising when morning comes. the panic i felt was real, and i was trying to convey this feeling to the others i met.
but no one seemed to understand and i just went around from place to place and halfway through, my dream started turning into some sort of musical. how strange. in the end i came to meet that One Remaining Issue but couldn't bring myself to say anything of importance because i figured that nothing would change since i was already going to die and it would be best if i just left things as they were.
then as i was waiting to die and in panic of what was to come, i realised that OH I'M ONLY DREAMING and forced myself to wake up.
anyway the point is, i had a night to wrap up my life but i didn't do anything in the end. this means that either
a) my life is good as it is now,
or
b) i am a loser and i am unable to make use of my final chance.
the rest of the night was spent trying to deal with that One Remaining Issue in my life and also meeting various people along the way, like my mother and some other people i can't recall now. it was quite an interesting dream, thinking that oh shit i won't be exising when morning comes. the panic i felt was real, and i was trying to convey this feeling to the others i met.
but no one seemed to understand and i just went around from place to place and halfway through, my dream started turning into some sort of musical. how strange. in the end i came to meet that One Remaining Issue but couldn't bring myself to say anything of importance because i figured that nothing would change since i was already going to die and it would be best if i just left things as they were.
then as i was waiting to die and in panic of what was to come, i realised that OH I'M ONLY DREAMING and forced myself to wake up.
anyway the point is, i had a night to wrap up my life but i didn't do anything in the end. this means that either
a) my life is good as it is now,
or
b) i am a loser and i am unable to make use of my final chance.
2 Comments:
you know. i understand totally what you're saying.
i had the same dream, i did some major crime and was going to be hanged. everyone was continuing life normally, preparations for my death was going on.. like they were getting the funeral process ready and everyone was sympathetic but no one understood how final my day was.
and i was just so scared and i just couldnt bring myself to accept the fact that i was going to die and not be around anymore.
yes it was panic. and i woke up and i can still remember the terrible dread.
thanks for sharing.
By
Anonymous, at January 13, 2008 10:15 pm
oh you're welcome. however my dream's focus was more on that One Remaining Issue rather than my impending doom.
my death was just an irritating itch, but oh my, the panic i felt from that itch was terrible.
By
cromber, at January 14, 2008 12:16 am
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