it did nothing to me
i think that i have a very bad temper, but i can control it to the point where i am sure that no one else knows about it. did you know? anyway i've gotten so good at this that i don't even feel it anymore. it really takes a whole lot to piss me off.
a lot of things can make me angry, or have the potential to make me angry if i left it unchecked. but there's no point in getting angry, or at least that's what i believe. when i'm angry i like to destroy, and i really don't like to witness what i can do.
one of the ways i do this is to develop a detachment to things. i step out of my body and if i'm not in there, whatever's coming won't affect me. i step out and look at myself, look at the things that can potentially anger me, and they are so insignificant.
i look at myself and analyse my feelings all the time. why am i getting angry? is it because the situation is damaging me, or because the idea of the situation is? how do i put this?
imagine a person with a gun, he wants to kill me. he pulls the trigger in my face but the gun is not loaded. what damage did it do to me? nothing. but the idea is very damaging. he did it with the intention to kill.
so at this point in this metaphorical story, i would probably start getting angry and want to destroy something (in this case, probably the guy who wanted to kill me). but i don't like to destroy, because it brings about many repercussions. and so i step out and convince myself that it's alright, that i'm fine therefore i shouldn't be angry.
sometimes i surprise myself that i manage to stay calm in the most damaging of situations.
a lot of things can make me angry, or have the potential to make me angry if i left it unchecked. but there's no point in getting angry, or at least that's what i believe. when i'm angry i like to destroy, and i really don't like to witness what i can do.
one of the ways i do this is to develop a detachment to things. i step out of my body and if i'm not in there, whatever's coming won't affect me. i step out and look at myself, look at the things that can potentially anger me, and they are so insignificant.
i look at myself and analyse my feelings all the time. why am i getting angry? is it because the situation is damaging me, or because the idea of the situation is? how do i put this?
imagine a person with a gun, he wants to kill me. he pulls the trigger in my face but the gun is not loaded. what damage did it do to me? nothing. but the idea is very damaging. he did it with the intention to kill.
so at this point in this metaphorical story, i would probably start getting angry and want to destroy something (in this case, probably the guy who wanted to kill me). but i don't like to destroy, because it brings about many repercussions. and so i step out and convince myself that it's alright, that i'm fine therefore i shouldn't be angry.
sometimes i surprise myself that i manage to stay calm in the most damaging of situations.
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