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Monday, March 14, 2011

just believe

"are you praying to the same god that made this happen?"
- comment on a youtube video of the japan tsunami

religion to me is something that my grandparents do, or used to do. when i was young we would all go to the temple during the times that we were supposed to go to the temple and make offerings to my grandfather or great grandparents. sometimes my grandmother would burn offerings in the corridor.

i wasn't brought up on any one religion. my grandparents were taoists, although not particularly devout, i think. there was an altar in my house and my grandmother would light joss sticks everyday. no one ever taught me anything about taoism. it was just something they do, like they have been doing all their lives, picked up from their parents and their grandparents. i wonder if my grandparents ever asked 'why' when they were younger.

when i asked, my mother taught me a more christian-orientated version of god, although she wasn't ever christian. god made the world. when people die, they go to heaven. if you're bad, god will punish you. we burn paper money and cars and houses and those in heaven will recieve them. that's just the way it was to me, and i didn't question much.

as i got older, i started to question. if god loves us, why does he make us suffer? if every religion has different gods, which one is the real one? and as i got even older, i asked even more. man created religion, but did god create man? if every religion we have today is drastically different from what they were centuries ago, how authentic are they? how about aliens? do they go to heaven too?

this generation has to be one of the most un-religious in the history of the world. we have too much knowledge available. we want the facts, we want concrete evidence. show me god and i'll believe in him, we say. but the problem is, religion is based on faith. faith is invisible, and we don't have time for that. we can question god and religion, but he's not around to answer them, and so we dismiss it.

i think humans cannot really survive without religion, because otherwise it wouldn't have been created in the first place. we need it, a blind faith, something to believe in, something to bring us through the darkest of nights. it may or may not be real, but as long as you truly believe in it, that makes it real, right? after all there is a lie in every belief.

me though, i think i have too many questions unanswered to be able to allow myself to believe in anything. i do want there to be a god though, because i want all my questions to be answered when i die. i don't wanna die and not know. aliens? sea monsters? big foot? ghosts? god? i wish i could know everything.

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