someday

this job thing is turning out to be a long and painful process.

i don't know what i want to do, i don't know what industry i would like to be in, so i'm looking at almost every job ad (when i find the motivation to, that is) that appears appealing, reading the descriptions and hoping to strike gold.

what is important to me is working environment, colleagues, superiors, company culture, but all these won't be known until i'm actually working there. and of course the pay has to be reasonable otherwise i would have already tried to be a social worker or whatever.

while attempting to narrow down my options, i thought of the things that i'm good at, but i didn't know how to translate any of them into things that i could find in a job. anyway most of the things i'm good at seem to be rather useless things.

i then thought of the things that i like to do, but damn that's worse. nowhere near what i would find in any job. sports, reading, chilling out, internet, music, motorbikes, clothing... please i would be eternally grateful if you could find me a job that matches these interests.

feeling desperate, i moved on to my degree and the things i learned in school. banking & finance in its entirety doesn't appeal to me at all, but i still looked at my exam results to see which modules i did well in, hoping that perhaps i could specialise in them.

fuck me, the modules that i did well in (for my standards) were modules that i really hated and found to be absolutely shitty, corporate finance, investment management and principles of accounting. on the other hand, i liked my psychology module and had an interest in it, but i did so terribly in the exams, maybe because i was actually reading for enjoyment rather than studying and memorising it.