silent

i started to type entries down on my phone because it seems that everytime i get online, i either feel too fucked to write or i just lose all the information stored in my head. sometimes i think up complete posts, and then conveniently forget everything when i start typing in this box. so here's the first of possibly many many of such to come.

"why so quiet?" a girl asked me in the morning of the second day of orientation. why so quiet? it's actually rather surprising that someone said that. wussli would obviously strongly oppose to anything related with me and quietness. but it's true. i am a quiet person. really.

i don't like to talk to strangers, and being my classmate doesn't mean that you're any less of a stranger to me. and it remains the same even if i know your name. normally it takes a few days before i can reassure myself that the people i meet are not some sort of mirage. and only after i confirm that they're real that i can start to talk to them.

so before this time, i am quiet. and this is the time when people think i'm a nice guy. once i start to be un-quiet, people generally call me either one of the following - fucker, asshole, bastard, or some kind of combination of the above mentioned words of affection.

besides, since them classmates are basically nothing more than strangers, there isin't really much to talk about. like trying to talk to a bangla worker just because he's my classmate. plus, i really don't believe in introduing myself and then trying hard to fill in all the awkward voids with meaningless questions. we would get to know each other in due time anyway. it's easier and much less weird.

but please do not hesitate to talk to me if you feel the urge to. i can talk, just don't like to initiate conversation. if you happen to like afi, bright eyes, or any such bands, i will definitely have something nice and interesting to say. it's an even greater bonus if for some reason you think i'm sexy. the last sentence applies to females only.

- written friday 10.30pm, in hope that somone would read this and answer all their questions about me.

i am a vagina too

i was fooled into believing that i only had to sit for lectures in even weeks and tutorials in odd weeks, thereby halving my overall school time. as i've said, i was fooled. i have to attend both. BOTH. school sucks now. yes. i retract everything i said in the second paragraph of my previous post.

lectures are boring. the lecturers are boring. the topics are boring. waking up to go to school is boring. maybe i just suck. nah, point rejected.


midgets lead sad lives. they are basically normal, except they're short. and because they're short, they're not normal. and because they're acutally rather normal, they try to act normal. and because their acting sucks, their normalism is normally not too normal.

midgets like the one from amazing race. or even weeman from jackass. he kicks his own head to make people laugh so they would think he's cool so they wouldn't outcast him. don't think he realises that normal people do not kick their own heads. it's like eating shit to join the shit-eaters gang because they're the only group that you can get into.

look what happens when you try to act like you're normal.
42 midgets who think they're normal + 1 african lion = 28 dead + severed limbs + broken bones
maybe they would've had a chance if they were actually normal. next time they're gonna hold a match with 42 people who think they're giants and an african elephant.

6 months

26th november 2004 was the last day of my exams and the first day of the longest holiday i've had. 6 months later, it's today. sad to say, school starts tomorrow. i still haven't had enough holidays. school school school.

at least i won't be stuck in classrooms and more classrooms like in secondary school. on a normal day i'd only have 2 to 4 hours of lessons. so i suppose that's quite damn good. and the earliest i have to be in school is 9. so that's even better than quite damn good.

but the point is, i still hate school.


oh yes, i saw something shocking yesterday. i was happily sitting in the bus and some people boarded. there was a girl maybe around 15 wearing something that looked like this


then as i took a somewhat closer look, i realised that there was something odd.

her nipples were sticking out, because she wasn't wearing a bra, because her bra straps would show through her blouse, because she is too poor to buy a strapless bra.

but that wasn't the main problem.


her nipples looked like that. PLUS, they had weird shapes. and they weren't grey.

so i can conclude that the girl
- is fashion consious enough not to allow her bra straps to show.
- is too poor to buy a proper strapless bra.
- is too dumb to realise her nipples have weird shapes.
- is fucking stupid to think they don't look weird when they do not sit at the same level.

OR maybe that's the whole point. maybe she gets kicks out of messing around with guys like me. maybe they're just raisins. maybe her nipples are normal after all.

and this reminds me of an episode of arrested development i saw a few weeks ago, where the secretary went for a boob-job and didn't wear a bra to work. and her nipples were not level too. and i was wondering if they were really like that or was the director just messing around. i'm still wondering.


uh, please note that i was not intentionally staring at her breasts. they were just too weird not to look at. really.

gayness and more

i saw a gay while going to school on wednesday. as i later discovered, he goes to the same school as me. he wore a black and pink singlet that looked like this.

pink dots were added to emphasise gayness.

he carried a bag that looked like this.

in a different colour which i can't remember. probably black.

he also carried a jacket, probably to allow his gayness to shine.

he wore a slip-on on one foot and a high-cut on the other. how unique. although i have huge problems with people wearing different coloured shoes, such as nike dunks in different colourways, at least they are the same type of shoe. wearing slip-ons and hi-cuts at the same time is incredibly stupid because the shoes are totally different in ways such as the thickness of the sole, which probably led the the limp spotted on said gay. sort of like walking in heels on one foot and slippers on the other. it doesn't work.


although it may seem otherwise, i really do not have a problem with gays. however, there are some who seem unaware that gays are only supposed to 'love' other gays, such as anus' friend, as can be linked from assron's blog. i don't think it's that hard of a concept to understand. gays like gays, normal people like normal people. straight guys do not EVER fall for gays, no matter how sexy they think they are. it's basic gay knowlege that even straight people like myself know.

and then there are the selfish homos. people like coby from the latest survivor. he adopted a little girl because he is gay and unable to concieve through anal sex. despite what they may think, a gay couple is not a normal couple, and are not suitable to raise children. it's extremely selfish to believe that their 'children' would grow up to lead normal lives. having a male mother or female father isin't exactly normal, in any sense of the word.

their children are forced to accept that they 'love' their parents because there really isin't any other way out. they were born normal but raised in an abnormal family, which is something that can be avioded. homos should not be allowed to adopt.

besides, homosexuals are sort of well-known for their fickleness. they almost always have multiple partners until they 'marry'. and since marriage is not always legal, seperation is easy since there wasn't any marriage to begin with. like breaking up with your girlfriend. so the child is then brought up by a single gay parent. how normal.

we're all cool

if you read last sunday's sunday times, you'd probably have seen their feeble attempt at deluding singaporeans to think we're 'hip'. i have absolutely no idea what was the point of that, since we haven't expressed the need to be 'hip', nor said that we weren't.

anyway, is being cool all that important to a country? i don't think so. businessmen would not think "wow, singapore is so cool. let's go do business with them." actually no one cares. the only reason i can think of is that the government made a special request to the news editor to get them to write about us being cool because they feel like we are feeling inferior to the 'cooler' nations. either that or the news people are really free.

besides, the reasons they gave for us being 'hip' were tragically stupid, which again leads to the point that singapore isin't the least bit 'hip'. as the poor reporters struggled to dig out any little 'hip-ish' facts they can, some stupid fuck decided to do one on food and celebrities.

they decided to list the food stalls foreign celebrities visit. which again, is incredibly stupid. if i were a celeb visiting singapore on business, of course i would go eat at food stalls. what else can i do? sit in my room and order room service all day? it's not as if they came all the way from where ever specially to eat laksa or anything like that.

then they listed movies, books and songs that mentioned singapore or is about singapore. and they even had a movie that was made in 1928. wow, so singapore was 'hip' 80 years ago. not any more.

anyone who was 'won over' by that attempt is stupid, since the supposed reasons for which we are cool really demean our intelligence. imagine what a visitor would think. "whoa, singapore is so uncool that they have to write articles about their coolness to make themselves feel better."
not that it matters of course.

i am rich

the last pair of shoes i bought sucked ass, so i sold it to my brother at a loss of ONLY $5. i'm a great businessman. that's why i'm in business studies.

anyway, i bought these on friday.

$90.


black.


it says lakai. my mother thought it was thai.


believe it or not, i actually had something vaguely interesting to write about. but after inhaling large amounts of paint fumes, plus my constantly degenerating brain, plus ample amounts of laziness, i forgot what i was supposed to write. yay.

boys and girls

once upon a time, in a land not too far away, there lived a man. this man had a dark secret which he had never told anyone before. you see, he liked little boys and girls. nothing wrong with that, except he was more interested in fucking them rather than playing hide-and-seek. the man was a pedophile, the first ever recorded case in history.

however, this man faced a big problem. all the little girls were not sluts. they wore dresses that covered them from neck to knee, not even exposing a little sliver of flesh for his perverted eyes to feast on. besides, they always went home on time and didn't stay out till late when bad people can abduct them easily. all the little boys were taught by their fathers to be men from a young age, and he knew that his balls would be ripped off by their little hands if he even tried to do anything funny.

thus, he was constantly frustrated by all his failed attempts to kidnap little children to satisfy his needs. once, he spent half his day's earnings on a lollipop (sweets were expensive back then, either that or he had a shit job) and tried to get a girl to "pet his pet snake" in exchange for it, but she just took the candy and ran away to join her friends. not only could he not get any physical action, there was also nothing vaguely sexual to look at.

so one day, the guy decided to just give up and get married to a hooker. at least he knew he would get some action with her.

now fast forward to present day earth. same guy, same situation. he could never imagine the troubles faced by himself back in the day. "no way," he thought. now, little girls were sluts, and little boys were sissies. he could do anything to them. ANYTHING!


a long time ago, anything sexual was rare. looking at dogs mating was probably the closest anyone got to watching any 'LIVE HOT ACTION' before they got married. people did not harbour fantasies about having sex with children because sex was kinda special back then.

not too long ago, everyone is having sex with each other. 10-year-olds can catch 'LIVE HOT ACTION' at the click of a mouse. men were getting tired of watching the same old porn everyday, tired of fucking the same women all the time. "they all feel the same," they said. not even 18-year-olds dressed as schoolgirls caught their fancy.

so they searched for something different. anything was game to them. animals, children, transsexuals, even dead bodies. the world we live in is conducive to pedophilia. we can't blame men for being pedophiles. parents should be blamed for allowing their children to dress like little hookers.

yesterday i saw a girl not any older than 10, wearing a shirt that only had a few strings covering her back. and she was out with her father (or was he a pedophile?). now i can only think of 2 possibilities.

1) the girl went out to buy that shirt herself, and her parents didn't object to her wearing it.
2) the girl's parents bought that shirt for her.

both are fucked. it's stupid. if my daughter wants to buy something like that, i'll sell her to a brothel since she's such a slut anyway.

no shit

"i hope i don't sound too ungrateful. well, history gave modern man a telephone to talk to strangers, a machine gun and a camera lense."
road to joy - bright eyes


this came last week.


went to collect this today.


last time i cut was before i went to china.


2 month old nails are sexy.

i suck (for a fee)

"dear infatuation, you do not see me. die here beside you in see-through obscurity."
starry configurations - jets to brazil

there were some mats revving up their motorbike engines downstairs. they were celebrating the wedding of a fellow mat. but some of them were riding lousy shit scooters. so it was "poot-poot-pooot" rather than the macho-ish "vroom-vrooom" they were hoping for. now they're playing drums. they were blasting music yesterday and this morning.

i think wedding dinners are unnecessary. it's just a fucking-super-dooper fancy way of telling people you're married when they already know. maybe celebrations are just fun.


we are all against people. neighbours hate each other. different races hate each other. the rich and poor hate each other. old people and skaters hate each other. straight people and gays hate each other. everyone denies this and yet everyone participates.

indians are smelly, mats are lazy, chinese are perfect. ang mohs are superior, muslims are terrorists. we all discriminate against those who are different. i think it's rather normal. who wouldn't be worried about being friends with a person with purple skin and blue hair?

actually we all fear each other. that's what guns were invented for. it's the same fear you had when your mother threatened to get the karang-kuni man to catch you if you didn't listen to her when you were young.